The Delivery Boy
by Jura
Summary: Poor Kenshin! A short story when Kenshin is the victum of Kaoru's feminine whimsy. Kaoru sends Kenshin into town to pick up some 'groceries'...poor Kenshin


The Delivery Boy

"Now Kenshin don't forget to pick up the right stuff or no food for a week."

Hmmm, Kenshin thought, maybe a lack of Kaoru's cooking wouldn't be so bad...

"Kenshin? Are you hearing me?" Kaoru scolded.

"Yes Miss Kaoru. Don't worry I'll get what you need. Now if you would please give me the list and I'll be on my way," said Kenshin sweet as honey.

"Kenshin all you need to do is give the list to a grocer down at the other end of town and he'll have my order ready," instructed Kaoru.

Kenshin took the small piece of paper from her and slipped it into his pocket. He picked up his reverse-blade sword and walked out to the dojo's doors with Kaoru flowing behind him.

"OK Miss Kaoru, I'll be on my way now and be back in a few hours. Now what end of town did you say this grocer is?" asked Kenshin.

"The west-end of town Kenshin. Haven't you been listening to me?" replied Kaoru.

"Yes Kaoru," said Kenshin as he started his way on the road. "See you soon."

"Bye! Be careful!" waved Kaoru after him.

It was about half an hour after Kenshin set off and finished humming all the little tunes he remembered when he started wondering about why Kaoru had to get groceries on the other end of town and not from the grocer down the street.

"Funny girl," Kenshin said to himself.

As Kenshin walked on talking to various sorts of people along the way he realized what kind of place the west-end of town really was. The road was cobblestone and was littered, the buildings got more elaborate and larger, and the people were so different. They all looked at Kenshin, knowing he had to be from out of town, with mild interest or amusement.

Kenshin was walking and looking around in awe until he bumped into someone, "Oh excuse me Miss! I'm so sorry. Please let me help you," he said as he got up rubbing his head.

As he put his hand out to help out the woman, "YEEEEYAAAAA!" he shrieked. The woman looked up confused with her face caked with makeup. She had bright red lips, and big fluffy hair and eyelashes that looked like tarantula legs. Kenshin wasn't sure she was a lady at all and quickly retracted his hand.

"Well are you gonna help me up big boy?" said the woman from the ground in what Kenshin guessed was supposed to be her charming tone.

"Uh...yes of course Miss," he said unsure and offered his hand once more with uncertainty.

She grabbed it and accidentally gave Kenshin minor cuts from her long, manicured nails. Kenshin was relieved when she let go of his hand and massaged it with his other. Kenshin noticed her fishnet stockings, super short miniskirt, and tight jacket on top of her revealing top underneath.

"So buddy how much you got?" she asked leaning towards him.

"Uh, excuse me Miss?" he asked warily.

"What? Oh you must be new to these parts," she said and giggled.

"What's so funny," Kenshin asked annoyed.

"You don't know what I am do you," she asked wiggling her eyebrow suggestively.

"Uh...Well I've never seen a woman quite like you if that's what you mean," he replied.

She giggled some more, "Sorry to bother you buddy. See ya around," she called as she started walking the other way.

"Hey wait!" cried Kenshin. "I'm supposed to go to some grocer's around here. If you would be so kind to help me?"

She smiled, "There's a grocer's right behind that corner there buddy."

Kenshin thanked her many times and off he went to the grocers. Finally, he thought, half the journey done.

Kenshin pushed through the crowd and ended up right in front of a fairly large stand with fruits and vegetables on display.

"Excuse me sir," he said to the man standing behind the tables of produce.

The bald man turned around from his work and observed Kenshin, "Oh hello! Please sir how may I help you?" he said with a big smile almost equivalent with his big nose and mustache.

"Actually I'm here to pick up an order for someone. This is the list I was instructed to give you," Kenshin said handing the bald man the list from his pocket.

The man took and I folded it open and read it twice. He eyed Kenshin looking from his feet to the tallest crimson hair on his head and back again and muffled a laugh.

"Sir?" the bald man asked in almost a sarcastic tone, "is this order for you?"

Kenshin looked puzzled, "Well no sir, like I said I was instructed to give it to you."

"By a woman perhaps?" he asked inquisitively.

"Uh, yes sir."

The bald man sighed and gave a final chuckle, "Sir this order has to go to my brother down the road. If you like I will get one of my delivery boys to quickly run and pick it up and bring it back here for you."

Kenshin sighed relieved he wouldn't have to battle the busy streets once again, "Oh thank you sir very much."

The man yelled and a little boy answered the call and quickly ran off after the man told him where to go. Kenshin was looking around and a few minutes later the same little boy came back with something wrapped in tissue paper in a basket.

"Thank you," said Kenshin taking the bag from the boy. When he realized the items were wrapped in tissue he looked to the boy and back to the bag.

Must be some expensive seaweed, he thought. And with that Kenshin was on his way back to town. He was surprised that Kaoru even knew how to cook seaweed properly and thought of all the delicious dishes he could whip up for them, which made his stomach grumble.

When Kenshin reached the doors of the dojo and pushed them open, Kaoru was there to greet him.

"Kenshin you're back!" she said happily at first, then her voice became quiet and serious, "Did you look at the," she pointed to the bag.

"No Kaoru, its only seaweed isn't it? And very expensive seaweed at that for it to be wrapped in tissue," he said.

Kaoru looked at him confused at first then smiled, "OK Kenshin, I'll take that," she said whisking away the bag and headed inside.

"Miss Kaoru?" said Kenshin quietly.

Kaoru turned around from the door, "Oh?"

"I'm a little hungry, do you still have any food left from dinner?"

Kaoru pointed to a bowl of plain rice waiting for him on the porch. Kenshin smiled and waited for Kaoru to go inside and quickly jumped on the precious morsel stuffing his face. After all that time, nearly starving and with all that food in front of him, waiting for some seaweed! Rice never tasted so good!

"Kenshinnnn?" said Kaoru from behind the door.

Kenshin perked up and the door slide open and out came Kaoru's bare leg gave a little kick as she poked her head out with it.

Kenshin gulped thinking he was about to be rewarded for all his hard work. He set aside his bowl and chopsticks and turned to face Kaoru who winked at him.

"TADA!" shouted Kaoru and she jumped out flaunting a full length sparkly red dress, with spaghetti straps and a lengthy slit exposing most of her leg.

Kenshin's mouth dropped and he tipped over from shock, "Seaweed?" he asked absent mindedly.

Kaoru bent over to him still on the porch floor and therefore letting Kenshin catch glimpse of...

"Sorry Kenshin, I just didn't want you to know," she apologized earnestly.

Kenshin got up and sighed, "Oh... it's all right Miss Kaoru. Next time please just tell me what you are sending me out for."

Kaoru smiled.

"So what did you get that dress for anyway?" he asked

"What a girl can't indulge herself time to time?" said Kaoru defensively as she spun around.

Kenshin smiled weakly and turned back to his rice and resumed eating.

Kaoru turned to go back inside when she quickly commented from the door, "Oh Kenshin because the dress was...well we'll be eating rice for a few months."

Kenshin dropped his bowl and chopsticks and froze where he sat, "RICE?"


End file.
